Desire
by Rumbelle96
Summary: Set after Fight The Future. Mulder and Scully try to get back to 'Normal' field work only to have to share one motel room. Feelings and emotions come out about there Near Kiss in Mulders Hallway.
1. Chapter 1

It had been one hell of a week. After their return from Antarctica

and a too short recovery period they had been back in the basement office as if nothing had happened. Filling out paper work and attempting to return to their normal lives (or as close as they ever got to normal). But already the steady workday had begun to tire. After only a week Mulder had begun to search for a simple case that would get them back out in the field. Something easy with nomonsters to chase or little gray men. This little trip to Iowa had seemed just the thing. Residents had been reporting strange lights at the edge of town for the past year but no one had bothered to take it seriously until a more publicised case in Des Moines captured the media's attention. Now suddenly everyone had a "glowing ball of light" or "strange floating colors" story that they were dying to share with anyone who asked. Mulder shook his head ruefully. Too bad it had just turned out to be some farmer with a weird idea about the affect of different colors of light on the growth patterns of corn. He chuckled to himself remembering the look of irritation Scully had flashed him when the farmer said he'd gotten the idea from an acid induced flashback.

It was nearly dark by the time they'd made it back into town to find a hotel. Surprisingly it took them another half hour just to find one with a vacancy. The local fall harvest festival was this weekend one of the hotel clerks had told them. Almost everything in the area was booked solid. Luckily he seemed to remember that one of the small inns at the edge of town might still have a couple rooms open. Ten minutes later they were standing in the office of the Cozy Court Motel. The bored looking attendant informed them that while they had two rooms open, one had been reserved.

Mulder was just warming up to the task of trying to convince him to rent them both the rooms when Scully interrupted him:

"Mulder, let's just take the one room," she said.

"But, Scully..."

"Look, it's not worth the hassle and all I want to do is take a nice hot bath an climb into bed."

"Oooh, Scully..."

She gave him the don't-start-with-me-Mulder look before turning to

the attendant. "Does one of the rooms have a couch?"

"Yeah," the clerk grumbled checking the records. "I'll have to charge you double occupancy, though."

"Fine, whatever. We'll take it." Scully said reaching for the keys.

A few minutes later...

"How do I let you drag me to these godforsaken places?" Scully asked wearily as they entered the room.

"Because life would be unbearably boring with out me," Mulder said with a boyish grin as he collapsed on the couch.

Scully snorted in mock annoyance as she headed for the bath room.

Two hours later found Scully asleep in the bed and Mulder channel surfing on the couch. He glanced over his shoulder at her sleeping form and repressed a sigh of longing. It was hard enough getting any sleep at night in his apartment. At least there all he had were his shadowy memories of her to keep him up. Having the genuine article just feet away made sleep an impossibility. Before he realised he'd moved he was standing at the side of the bed looking down at her. God, she was beautiful. Her red hair fanned out like a halo around her, framing ivory skin that seemed to glow in the dim light of the TV. Even the light tint of frostbite that still tainted her cheeks and forehead couldn't detract from her ethereal beauty. Now here was a real X-File: What was this gorgeous, intelligent woman doing hanging out with a self obsessed jerk like him? He wondered for the ten thousandth time why she hadn't just called it quits and left him yet. 'Ugh, what am I doing?' He asked himself while rubbing his face in his hands. 'If she wakes up to me looming over her I'll be lucky if she doesn't shoot me. Again.' He chuckled at the thought and resumed his position on the couch. He was just starting to get into an old episode of the Twilight Zone when she called out his name.

'Did I just hear what I thought I heard?' Mulder wondered to himself.

'Naw, Scully never calls me Fox, must've just been wishful thinking.'

"Fox...don't leave me..."

'Now, I know I heard that!' Mulder thought as he leapt over the

couch to the bed. "Dana?" He called out tentatively as he reached her side. Scully had managed to cocoon herself in the sheets and as she struggled to free herself tears flowed down her face. "Fox..."she cried out again pitifully and Mulder felt something inside himself break. Disregarding all protocol, he swept her into his arms and rocked her against his chest.

"Shh, Dana honey, it's okay. I'm here, it's okay," he murmured into her hair. As soon as he'd taken her into his arms she clung to him weeping like a lost child. This was a side of Dana Scully he'd never seen before.

"Wake up, Dana, it was just a dream..."

Slowly Scully came back to herself. 'Dana, he never call's me Dana'

"Mulder," she said weakly as she pulled back a little to wipe the

tears off her face, "what's going on?"

"So we're back to Mulder now, huh? You were calling me Fox a minute

ago." He said with a tired grin as he looked down into her tear

streaked face.

"I was?" she asked, feeling hazy.

"You were having a bad dream and you called out for me. Do you

remember what you were dreaming?"

A flash of desire in hazel eyes, soft-spoken desperate words, the promise of a kiss... She shook her head against the memory. "No...no,I don't remember."

"Are you sure?" he asked while wiping away some more of the drying

tears with his thumb as he cupped her face in his hand. "It usually helps to talk about it."

"Voice of personal experience, or is that Dr. Mulder's clinical opinion?" Scully snapped at him and immediately regretted it. He was

after all, just trying to help. If only he wasn't holding her so close...

Mulder just smiled wryly at the snap and brushed it off with a chuckle.

"Well, I guess you could say it was a little bit of both. So wanna talk about it?"

"I'm just fi-" she started, breaking off as she looked up into his eyes. 'God, I could die when he looks at me like that. All wide eyed concern and sweet boyish intensity. How can I lie to him when he looks at me like that?'

"I was dreaming about that night in the hallway." She finished quietly.

'I can't believe she actually told me' "Oh." He chuckled and gave a self depreciating sneer.

"Yeah, I can see how the thought of kissing me would give you nightmares."

"If I was calling out for you then doesn't that alleviate the possibility that you were the part of the dream I was trying to escape from?"

'Uh-oh, what did I just say?' Panic shot through her body as she realized what she'd just insinuated. 'I've got to get out of his arms!' she thought as she tried to push Mulder away, but instead of releasing her he just held her tighter. 'Oh, god, does she mean what I think she means?'

"What were you trying to escape from then?" he said in a husky voice as he looked down into her deep blue eyes. 'Please, let me be right about this'

"Mulder, let me go." She said quietly as she tried to avoid his gaze.

"You haven't answered my question yet." He reached down and pulled her chin gently up to force her to look at him.

"If you weren't running from me or the kiss then what was it, the bee?"

"I wasn't running from anything." She said, sidestepping the question. 'How does he know me so well? Mulder just let me go!' Every second she sat there in his arms she became more and more aware of him physically. At this point he was holding her so tight she could feel his chest nudging her breasts with every breath he took. 'How could anyone resist such a sweet torture?' She closed her eyes for a moment to fight down the desire she felt surging up inside of her. He scarcely noticed her evasion as his eyes caught hers. He could see the need he felt for her reflecting in the ocean of her eyes. When she closed those eyes to dampen the flames of the fire he knew she felt burning inside her his control snapped. 'No, don't deny it!'

"Dana..." he murmured before he captured her lips with his own.

Warning alarms went off inside her head when she heard the strange quiet way he said her name, but before she could react his kiss was already on her mouth. Her eyes snapped open in shock and she froze. 'what-should-I-do-he's-kissing-me-oh-god-don't-stop-I-have-to-stop- this-oh-Fox' Conflicting emotions flashed through her head like lightning but still she hadn't moved. To his credit, it didn't take Mulder too long to realise the woman in his arms was being about as responsive a block of ice. 'Oh no, what have I done? How could I have been wrong?! I know what I saw in her eyes!' But doubt had begun to blossom in his heart alongside the terrible certainty that he'd just made the stupidest mistake of his life. He awkwardly broke off his embrace and released her. He stood up from the bed and ran a shaky hand through his hair as he headed for the couch.

"I'm sorry, Scully. I don't know what came over me." 'nothing much but love' he thought miserably. "It won't happen again, but I'lL

understand if you want to put in for a transfer or file harassment charges when we get back." 'Dana...don't leave me...' he thought.


	2. Chapter 2

"Oh, god, what have I done?! I can't let him think that I'd leave him over a kiss, especially not when it was what I wanted too!"

"Mulder, look-"

"No, Scully. Just let it go, okay? We both need to get some sleep. We've got an early flight tomorrow morning." And with that he rolled over on the couch.

Panic tore through her body, effectively immobilizing her.

'What am I going to do!'she asked herself. [Just let it go] the rational part of her mind told her. [He's your partner, you can't have that kind of relationship with him.] 'Why not, damn it! Haven't we earned this?!'

[Are you prepared to deal with the consequences of such a action?] That thought gave her pause. Was she ready to deal with the kind of changes a move in that direction would bring not only to their relationship but to their partnership as well? She closed her eyes and caught her face in her hands. Abruptly, she raised her head and sought out her partner with her eyes. Her decision was made. Mulder heard her get up from the bed and move over to the couch beside him. 'She's not going to let it go-I knew that, really I did' he thought with a sigh. "We need to talk about this." Her voice floated softly down to his ears. 'I knew this was coming. I might as well just get it over with.'

Still, he couldn't keep the petulant tone out of his voice when he spoke.

"All right, Scully. If you absolutely feel this can't wait till morning then I guess I've got no choice."

"Well, now that we've got that established, mind sitting up and making some room on the couch?"

oh yeah, kinda hard to carry on a conversation in this position isn't it? But, he thought with a shrug, he really didn't want to have this little talk at all...

"What, you don't find a conversation with the back of my head intellectually stimulating?" He said with a sneer as he got up and moved to the side of the couch.

'You knew he wouldn't make this easy...nothing like Mulder in full Defense mode.' Scully sat down on the opposite end of the couch andtried to will the tension out of her body.

Mulder could tell the second she switched into her "all business" persona. 'this is gonna be really good if she's already gone "enigmatic Dr. Scully" on me.'

"Mulder, we're both aware that we find each other physically attractive,"

Mulders ears perked up 'We are? Where was I when this became common knowledge? Maybe there's still some hope...'

"so it's hardly surprising that this happened. It was only a matter of time before one of us acted on the way we feel. And if you consider the stress we've been under and-"

"How do you feel?" Mulder asked, cutting of what she was saying as he leaned closer to her.

"W-what?" Scully asked, disconcerted by his sudden nearness.

Hearing the uncharacteristic stutter in her voice he decided to push the issue. He'd already come this far, if she was going to file harassment charges he might as well earn them.

"How. Do. You. Feel."

Each word was punctuated by the slow forward movement of his body from his end of the couch to hers.

"Fine, I'm fine." She said breathlessly.

'How does he manage to scramble me up like this?' Mulder chuckled. Yep, he was definitely having an affect on her. Time

for some truth from both of them.

"I'm glad you feel fine," he said as he completed his journey to her side.

She was so close... He lowered his voice to a seductive whisper.

"But I wanted to know specifically...how do you feel about me?"

God he was so close. She felt trapped in his eyes, drowning in pools of hazel. 'what is he doing to me?'

"Mulder?" she asked weakly

"whatare you doing?"

"Just asking you a question, Scully." He said innocently as he reached up and tucked a strand of fiery hair behind her ear. Or it would've been innocent if he hadn't caressed the line of her chin with his finger as he took his hand away from her face.

It was the touch of his hand that undid her. How long had she dreamed of him touching her like that? Fantasized about those long fingers tracing their way across her body?

She scrambled off the couch and away from him.

"I think you're right,Mulder. It is late and this is a conversation that we can have later." ... or never

"No, Scully," he said as he followed her off the couch,

"I think you're right: we need to discuss this." He watched as she moved over to her bag on the small nondescript motel table. I wonder what she's looking for? he thought as she rummaged through her things. What am I looking for? She wondered. Oh right, probably for some presence of mind; where did I put that? she thought with a giggle. She sobered immediately at the sound of Mulder moving across the room to stand behind her. Calm down, Dana, we can handle this. She turned to face him only to find her nose practically buried in his strong chest. or not. He smells so good...someone remind me again why I'm fighting this?[Because he's your partner, because it'll affect your work, because...]

He watched her frantically paw through her belongings for a minute before he felt himself being drawn to her side. Now I know how a moth feels before the candle's flame. Wonder how badly I'm about to get burned? When he reached her she turned around to face him with out any prompting. The silence weighed thickly for a another minute before he spoke.

"Dana, look at me please..."

Hesitantly she dragged her gaze up to meet his eyes. Time to lay it on the line...

"Scully...Dana..." oooh, this is gonna be way harder than I thought He swallowed convulsively and ran a quaking hand through his hair. Where do I even start with this? Oh well, when all else fails, begin at the beginning.

"When you walked into my basement office six years ago all I could think was, 'wonder how long it's gonna take to scare off this little spy'. I never thought - I mean if someone had told me then - UGH!" he cried out in frustration,

"I'm getting all off track here...Dana-" She silenced him by reaching up and pressing a single finger to his lips.

He probably would've gone on for an hour before he actually got to the point.

"Deep breath, Mulder," she said softly,

"I've given up onavoiding this so you don't have to worry about me going anywhere. Get your thoughts together and then try again."

He took a deep shuddering breath, reveling in the feel of her touch against his lips. She seemed to notice his distraction and took her hand away. Okay, let's try this again.

"If someone had told me then that 'that little spy' would become the most important person in my universe I would've laughed in their face. It still amazes me how quickly you slipped past all my defenses and settled into my heart. I'm not good at all this open sharing crap, if anything I'm the poster child for Denial Anonymous,"

that earned him a small smile,

"but there comes a point where even I have to face facts. I think I first realized when they...when they took you away from me." This was said with a quiet despair.

"They knew before I did, I think. They knew that nothing, not even death, would hurt me as much as taking you away."

She caught her breath in surprise. he's not saying what I think he's saying, is he? No! It's not possible!

"I guess what I'm trying to say is that I love you, Dana."

He held up a hand to stop the comment he could see trying to force it's way past her lips.

"And no, I don't mean in that 'partners, best buds, beer and pizza on Thursdays' kinda way, either."

He chuckled nervously at the blank look of utter shock that covered her features. He tried a joke to lighten the mood.

"Not exactly the response I was hoping for, but at least you haven't hit me yet."

He squirmed uncomfortably under the force of her , obviously she doesn't feel the same way: time to give her an easy out. He cleared his throat before beginning again.

"Look, I understand if you don't feel the same," why should she?he thought miserably.

"and I probably shouldn't have said anything but I just had to tell you. I hope this doesn't destroy our friendship or our partnership. Like I said earlier, if you want out I'll sign the paperwork as soon as you put it on my desk, but I hope you'll reconsider. The X-Files would be empty without you." Hefinished awkwardly. My life would be empty without you...

She sat there in stunned silence as he finished his speech. He loves me, Mulder loves me, Fox loves me. ME! Not that bitch Diana, or Phoebe, or Bambi, or Angela, but ME! I think I'm gonna pass out...

I shouldn't have said anything; what was I thinking?! Idiot, jerk, self centered egotistical asshole...

"Dana- uh, I mean Scully... Scully?" Still there was no response.

Panic gripped him with blinding force. Oh god, what have I done? I've got to get out of here! He turned quickly away from her and started toward the door. His sudden movement snapped Dana out of her reverie. Where is he going? she thought with a shot of panic. In a flash of insight she realised exactly how damning her silence must've seemed.

"Mulder!" she cried out as her hand snaked forward to catch his before he slipped out of her reach. He looked back in confusion at their joined hands. "Scully, what...?" His eyes flickered up to hers and were snared there. With their locked eyes they said the things that defied even an attempt at words.

Fear. Pain. Desire. Love. Acceptance.

With one swift tug she pulled him into her waiting arms. Again, the silent communication:

are you sure?

yes!

after everything I-

Cutting him off mid-thought she affirmed herself the best way she knew how: she closed the brief remaining distance between them and responded the way she'd wanted to the first time his lips had graced hers.

The sweet sensation of her body melding into his and the taste of her in his mouth chased all rational thought from his mind. The entire galaxy narrowed down to the petite redheaded woman in his arms. Hazy dreams certainly didn't remotely compare to the reality. After a couple of minutes he dragged himself reluctantly up from her kiss. Her eyes fluttered open and he took a rugged breath before answering the question he saw in them.

"Dana, if you want me to remain a gentleman, we have to stop right now."

"Mmm...now why would I want that?"

she asked with a sexy purr as she nuzzled his neck. The breath in his lungs expelled with a loud hiss as he gave in to the sensations she was inspiring. "Scuhl-leee!" he groaned as he rolled his head back to give her better access.

"So we're back to Scully now, huh? You were calling me Dana a minute ago."

She murmured between kisses.

"Honey, I'll call you whatever you want as long as you keep kissing me like that..."

he said as he nuzzled her hair. Scully smells like strawberries he thought right before she jerked her head up to meet

his eyes.

"Honey?"

She asked as she cocked an eyebrow at him. Did I actually just call Dana Scully "Honey"? I am so dead...just can't seem to stay outta trouble... He met her glare sheepishly.

"I take it 'honey' is not an acceptable term of endearment?"

She fought to keep her rigid mask in place, but in the end his 'kicked puppy' expression slid through her defenses with surprising

ease. She slipped her arms around his neck and looked up at him through lowered lashes.

"I think I could get used to being your honey."

she said in a voice that melt butter as she leaned up to kiss him again. Oh God Mulder thought as the affect of that voice shot through his body like electricity and pooled in the growing heat of his groin. It was getting difficult to think clearly. All he could concentrate on was the delicious way Dana was grinding her hips into his as she deepened their latest kiss. He moaned into her mouth as she pressed herself tightly up against him. Time to take this party elsewhere. He thought as he reached down and swung her into his arms without interrupting their embrace. Mulder settled her into his grip and almost lost it when the back of her pajama top shifted out of the way to leave his arm snaked around the bare flesh of her middle. Liquid fire coursed up his arm and the silk of her nightclothes seemed almost rough in comparison to the living satin of her skin. Dana moaned at the feel of his touch upon her bare body. As Mulder stood there reveling in this new sensation Dana dragged her mouth away from his.

"Mulder-bed!" she commanded imperiously.

Mulder chuckled slightly at her command, but there was no humor in his expression when he met her eyes,

"Your wish is my command, Milady," he said seductively.

again a big thank you to my lovely reviewer. Please leave reviews so I know if I should carry on. I love reading them xxx


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